Most people look forward to holiday breaks hoping to reenergize and relax.
For parents of autistic kids or those with other developmental differences, it may feel quite different.
Holidays can be chaotic. And I dare say, the Christmas holidays are the most chaotic ones.
Our kids thrive with routines, structure, and predictability. During Christmas time, we face the biggest changes in routines of the year. And that can turn the holidays into a very stressful time for all the family.
Christmas Time: A Huge Holiday Transition
Some autistic kids find small changes in their everyday routines extremely distressful.
If trying to change your pizza night from Friday to Saturday sounds like looking for trouble, imagine trying to cope with all the changes the Christmas holidays bring.
Some of the routine changes that your kid may need to adjust to during the Christmas holidays are:
- Different bedtime routines
- Different everyday routines (no school / parents at home)
- Unstructured and unpredictable days
- Big family gatherings with a lot of people to interact with
- Visiting other people’s homes (friends, relatives)
- Different foods
- Lots of noise (more people, fireworks, busy malls…)
- An overload of gifts and treats
- Traveling
9 Tips to Help Autistic Kids Navigate Christmas
We have been perfecting our approach to holiday seasons, and these are some of the things that work for us and could possibly help you too.
- Prepare in advance.
Start talking about the interesting things that will be happening during the holiday (you may use social stories- see other resources below) - Create a new holiday routine so that your kid can enjoy some predictability.
- Plan activities and events in a Christmas calendar
- Use Visual Schedules (great for toddlers too)
During school breaks, I often use a whiteboard to take my son through the activities that we will do during the day. I break it into short activities and mix not-too-exciting stuff with activities he loves.
I also use our calming cards (not just for holidays but all year round). - Prepare for Big Gatherings
- Explain to your child how these gatherings may affect them:
- Lots of noise
- More people in the house
- People trying to talk to them
- Less structure
- Make a plan for each contingency
- Headphones to mask loud noises
- Explore how your child feels about interacting with the visitors
- Explain how the visit will develop (with visuals if possible)
- Plan exit strategies or calming breaks
If you are planning big family gatherings, prepare some quiet space where your kid can retreat if they feel overwhelmed.
If you are visiting friends or family, plan for short visits, and leave while you can still enjoy success. - Energy Accounting Technique.
Even if your kid manages to cope with big gatherings, it may still be very draining.
The Energy Accounting is based around planning activities that will “replenish” our energy after those activities that may cause “depletion”.
You may read more about it in my post about Anxiety and Autism.
You could tell your kid “I know lunch at Auntie´s is really difficult for you. How about playing computer games for an hour, as soon as we come back from Auntie´s?”
- Explain to your child how these gatherings may affect them:
- Not Without My Earmuffs
Christmas holidays are especially noisy.
Fireworks, Christmas crackers, Christmas Carols, loud family reunions, busy malls.
Some of our kids are extremely sensitive to noises. So, don´t leave the house without their noise-canceling headphones. - Be Extra Vigilant.
If your kid is at risk of wandering behaviors, the risk may be higher during the holidays.
Holidays are an especially tricky time. Big family reunions. It is easy to lose track of what your kid is doing. You think your spouse/partner was keeping an eye on them, they thought it was somebody else.
Always, always be clear about who the designated person is to monitor your kid. If you have a “runner” it just takes a few seconds for them to wander off.
You may also be on holiday away from home and the set up won’t be “wanderer-proof”. So, as I said, be extra-vigilant.
If you feel your kid is at risk of elopement, you may find interesting information in these posts:- 30 Tips to Prevent your Autistic Kid from Wandering Off
- How to Choose a Special Needs GPS Tracker
And if you are seriously considering a GPS tracker, AngelSense is a great option for kids with special needs (their 30-day money-back policy makes it a risk-free option- try it here).
- During very busy times, plan for one-on-one attention
One of the stressors I identified in our Christmas holidays is my busy schedule. Our son craves my undivided attention, but the holidays are hectic (preparing luggage, meeting friends and relatives, decorating the house, preparing special meals, just to mention a few). That translates into less attention. And my kid quickly resents it.
One trick that I apply when I’m packing for our Christmas trip (meltdown guaranteed time) is ensuring I schedule my undivided attention. I use a “non-contingent attention program” (meaning, attention without any special reason), giving him lots of attention with an interval reminder on my watch. I go about packing, but I go to him every few minutes and interact. That removes the need to act up looking for a bit of Mommy time. - Special Needs & Air Travel
Christmas is also the time some families choose for a family trip.
If you are going on a long trip, I recommend you read “A Survivor’s Guide to Traveling with Kids.”
It’s packed with tips that will ensure stress-free trips, lots of them specifically for autistic kids.
I hope these tips help you navigate the next Christmas holidays with your kid with autism.
Other Interesting Christmas Articles
- Santa Claus Sensory Bottle: Christmas Crafts + Effective Calming Tool
- Santa Claus Names Around the World
- Fun Christmas Traditions from Around the World
- Sensory Gifts for Kids with Autism
♥ Pin / Share & help other families ⇓ ♥
