Helping Autistic Kids Through Christmas

Most people look forward to holiday breaks hoping to reenergize and relax.

For parents of autistic kids or those with other developmental differences, it may feel quite different.

Holidays can be chaotic. And I dare say, the Christmas holidays are the most chaotic ones.

Our kids thrive with routines, structure, and predictability. During Christmas time, we face the biggest changes in routines of the year. And that can turn the holidays into a very stressful time for all the family.

Christmas Time: A Huge Holiday Transition

Some autistic kids find small changes in their everyday routines extremely distressful.

If trying to change your pizza night from Friday to Saturday sounds like looking for trouble, imagine trying to cope with all the changes the Christmas holidays bring.                                               

Some of the routine changes that your kid may need to adjust to during the Christmas holidays are:

• Different bedtime routines
• Different everyday routines (no school / parents at home)
• Unstructured and unpredictable days
• Big family gatherings with a lot of people to interact with
• Visiting other people’s homes (friends, relatives)
• Different foods
• Lots of noise (more people, fireworks, busy malls…)
• An overload of gifts and treats
• Traveling

14 Tips to Help Autistic Kids Navigate Christmas

We have been perfecting our approach to holiday seasons, and these are some of the things that work for us and could possibly help you too.

1. Prepare in advance.
   Start talking about the interesting things that will be happening during the holiday (you may use social stories- see other resources below)
2. Create a new holiday routine so that your kid can enjoy some predictability.
3. Plan activities and events in a Christmas calendar
4. Use Visual Schedules (great for toddlers too)
   During school breaks, I often use a whiteboard to take my son through the activities that we will do during the day. I break it into short activities and mix not-too-exciting stuff with activities he loves.
   I also use our calming cards (not just for holidays but all year round).
5. Prepare for Big Gatherings
   • Explain to your child how these gatherings may affect them:
     • Lots of noise
     • More people in the house
     • People trying to talk to them
     • Less structure
   • Make a plan for each contingency
     • Headphones to mask loud noises
     • Explore how your child feels about interacting with the visitors
     • Explain how the visit will develop (with visuals if possible)
   • Plan exit strategies or calming breaks
     If you are planning big family gatherings, prepare some quiet space where your kid can retreat if they feel overwhelmed.
     If you are visiting friends or family, plan for short visits, and leave while you can still enjoy success.
   • Energy Accounting Technique.
     Even if your kid manages to cope with big gatherings, it may still be very draining.
     The Energy Accounting is based around planning activities that will “replenish” our energy after those activities that may cause “depletion”. 
     You may read more about it in my post about Anxiety and Autism.
     You could tell your kid “I know lunch at Auntie´s is really difficult for you. How about playing computer games for an hour, as soon as we come back from Auntie´s?” 
   • Prepping Extended Family.
     A quick heads-up to relatives can make gatherings much easier. A simple message explaining what helps your child, what may be tricky for them, and how others can support them can prevent misunderstandings.
     Most people appreciate a little guidance.
6. Managing Sensory Triggers
   Christmas comes with lots of sensory changes, and many autistic kids feel these shifts strongly. A little preparation can go a long way.
   • Noise
     The Christmas holidays are especially noisy.
     Fireworks, Christmas crackers, Christmas Carols, loud family reunions, busy malls. It can be really overwhelming!
     Noise-canceling headphones are essential for us during the holidays, and we use them proactively before things get too noisy.
   • Lights
     Flashing lights and busy decorations can be overstimulating. Decorating together helps your child know what will change, and choosing steady lights or simpler displays can make things more comfortable.
   • Smells
     Holiday scents like candles, pine, or baking spices may be intense for some kids and a sensory treat for others. Avoid strong fragrances at home if they’re tricky, and give relatives a quick heads-up if certain smells make things harder.
   • Touch
     Festive outfits and winter layers can feel uncomfortable. Let your child choose clothes that feel good to wear, even if they’re not traditionally Christmassy.
     Comfort will help them stay regulated throughout the season.
7. Food Differences / Selective Eating
   Food is another big change during Christmas. If your child is selective with foods, try bringing some preferred options to gatherings so they know there will be something safe to eat.
   It can also help to talk with family in advance so no one feels pressured to insist that your child “just try a bite.”
   Holiday meals do not need to become battles, and it is okay to keep things simple and predictable.
8. Gift Overload/ Gift Planning Strategy
   Some autistic kids may also feel overwhelmed by the excitement and unpredictability of gifts.
   • Opening presents slowly, one at a time, can help keep things manageable.
   • You can also prepare your child in advance by explaining how the gift exchange will work, who will be giving them presents, and what they can do if they feel they need a break.
   • And if your child prefers to open gifts privately, that is completely fine too.
9. Screen Time & Special Interests as Support Tools
   Holidays are a time when leaning on your child’s favorite activities can be incredibly helpful.
   Special interests, comfort items, and even extra screen time can make transitions easier and give your child predictable moments of calm.
   You know your child best, so don’t feel guilty about using the tools that help them stay regulated.
   
10. Be Extra Vigilant.
    If your kid is at risk of wandering behaviors, the risk may be higher during the holidays.
    Holidays are an especially tricky time. Big family reunions. It is easy to lose track of what your kid is doing. You think your spouse/partner was keeping an eye on them, they thought it was somebody else. 
    Always, always be clear about who the designated person is to monitor your kid. If you have a “runner” it just takes a few seconds for them to wander off. 
    You may also be on holiday away from home and the set up won’t be “wanderer-proof”. So, as I said, be extra-vigilant.
    If you feel your kid is at risk of elopement, you may find interesting information in these posts:
    • 30 Tips to Prevent your Autistic Kid from Wandering Off
    • How to Choose a Special Needs GPS Tracker
      And if you are seriously considering a GPS tracker, AngelSense is a great option for kids with special needs (their 30-day money-back policy makes it a risk-free option- try it here).
11. During very busy times, plan for one-on-one attention
    One of the stressors I identified in our Christmas holidays is my busy schedule. Our son craves my undivided attention, but the holidays are hectic (preparing luggage, meeting friends and relatives, decorating the house, preparing special meals, just to mention a few). That translates into less attention. And my kid quickly resents it.
    One trick that I apply when I’m packing for our Christmas trip (meltdown guaranteed time) is ensuring I schedule my undivided attention. I use a “non-contingent attention program” (meaning, attention without any special reason), giving him lots of attention with an interval reminder on my watch. I go about packing, but I go to him every few minutes and interact. That removes the need to act up looking for a bit of Mommy time.
12. Travel Logistics
    Christmas is also the time some families choose for a family trip.
    Traveling adds another layer of unpredictability. Whether you are going by car, train, or plane, a bit of planning can keep things smoother for your child.
    • If you are traveling by car or train, scheduling predictable breaks can help your child stay regulated.
      Bring familiar items, comfort objects, or calming activities so they have something consistent to rely on during transitions.
      Visual schedules or countdown timers also work well to show how long each part of the journey will take.
    • If your plans include airports, many now offer sensory rooms or designated quiet spaces. It’s worth checking ahead to know what options are available and identifying the calmest areas in case your child needs a break from the crowds and noise. Even small bits of preparation can make travel days feel more manageable for everyone.
      If you are going on a long trip, I recommend you read the blog post “A Survivor’s Guide to Traveling with Kids.” It’s packed with tips that will ensure stress-free trips, lots of them specifically for autistic kids.
13. Brief Note for Siblings
    If you have other children, the holidays can also be a good time to help them understand why their sibling might need extra support.
    A short conversation about noise, crowds, or routines can help siblings feel included and more prepared.
    You can also plan small moments of one-on-one time so everyone feels seen during such a busy season.
14. Remember that you don’t need to create a perfect Christmas. Your child doesn’t need every tradition or every event to have a meaningful holiday. Do what works for your family, keep things simple when you need to, and give yourself grace along the way.

I hope these tips help you navigate the next Christmas holidays with your kid with autism.

Looking for More Christmas Fun?

Other Interesting Christmas Articles

• Santa Claus Sensory Bottle: Christmas Crafts + Effective Calming Tool
• Santa Claus Names Around the World
• Fun Christmas Traditions from Around the World
• Sensory Gifts for Kids with Autism

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